The Wrong Direction

My RE followed up with me yesterday about the additional labs he had me get done.  He said it looks as though my hormonal functioning is within normal range and that it looked like I was getting ready to ovulate soon after the labs were drawn (6 days ago).  This means the Lupron is no longer influencing anything and I *should* be back to normal.  He is aware that I am now on CD 57 and attributes it to probably an ovarian cyst.  I've never had an ovarian cyst in my life (that I've known about), why is there more drama to this equation??  He suggested that I go ahead and start the BCP right away to shrink a potential cyst and get prepared for the IVF cycle.  Then I can have a period after the BCP and start fresh.  Call me crazy (well, I am) and I almost couldn't get the words out of my mouth to ask (I felt so ridiculous suggesting this), but I said, "what if I did ovulate and this our one in a million month"?.  He acknowledged my hope (albeit far fetched) and said he would do an u/s and labs tomorrow to find out if there is a cyst and if I did, in fact, ovulate and where I am in this cycle.  Then I could go forward comfortably with the BCPs.

He also said that my AMH has decreased slightly (man, the clock is really ticking, losing ground by the minute!!), but also said it is subject to slight variations at any given time and that it was still in the same range.  He reassured me (well, that was his intention I suppose) that we still have a fairly (his heavy emphasis on the 'fairly', not mine) good chance with IVF.  We did, however, discuss the Shared Success Program the clinic offers.  Its a package deal that gives you one fresh IVF and unlimited FETs (from the original IVF) until you bring home a baby or all the embryos are used and in that case you get some of your money back.  In our original meeting with this RE, he felt very confident that we would qualify for the SSP.  In our conversation yesterday he said that I do NOT qualify based on my AMH.  This to me is devastating.  Not financially, but emotionally, if they aren't willing to take the chance, should we?

I feel like I'm backsliding with all of this. I feel like the more information we get and the further we go, the more obstacles pop up to challenge my faith in this decision.  I'm usually pretty interested and somewhat excited about moving forward and finding things out (curiosity, control, progress, not sure which), but I am not looking forward to tomorrow's u/s.  I just don't want to find out any more bad news about how much harder all of this is going to be.  I feel like I'm physically and emotionally moving in the wrong direction.